Good morning from a cottage in Japan with an update to say “no update per se“. Thanks for all your sweet notes and good vibes… I’m eating all the snacks and hanging out with our rabbit, scribbling in journal and completely excited…
I want to wear matching outfits with him, I want to write books for him, I want to teach him all about his ancestry, I want to turn him on to all sorts of music and books, I want to be the dad who welcomes him and pals home from school with snacks and hang out space, I want to support him on anything and everything he wants to do, I want to let him be whoever he wants to be, I want to be an example of kind￼ness, empathy, intrepidness￼, courage, and sweetness. I want to introduce him to so many cultures and ways of life and be an example of respect, tolerance, advocacy and friendship.￼
I have stacks of maps and globes and art supplies and so many musical instruments and no TV. We have soft places to rest and projects going everywhere from pickles to paintings￼.
I will (try to) always be present, (almost) always put his needs first and prepare him for a wonderful life￼ with patience & unconditional love.
His mother is magnificent, sunny and happy every day of this journey, full of energy and ideas… Until yesterday working in the garden, making things on the sewing machine, playing piano and singing for him, reading nonconventional texts about taking the best care of him, going slow, staying calm, eating well and… Yesterday we even had a dance in our tiny kitchen￼￼. Hooray dopamine.
Btw, Contractions started yesterday late afternoon (JST) so, as we measured the interval time, ￼I made her a classic “japanese standard” dinner before taking her to the hospital… (hearty miso with daikon, brown rice, salted plum, pickled carrots, kimchi, grilled salmon, edamame) / noting: I will be that dad who makes the cutest bento lunches for the kid!
Oh, & I might have to invent my own alternative scouts organization to organize mellow camp outs at the goat farm￼ / “no badges, no saluting, just good times“￼#WeedScouts￼￼
So… Here’s a picture of amazing Ryoko two days ago at paternal grandpa Ichiro’s nearby grave asking for a little bit of support.￼ A bit of a talisman as of course during the pregnancy, we haven’t been out and about but take frequent walks to go clean his grave, light incense and talk about the beauty of it all. Yes, complete life reinvention.￼
PS As it all goes, maternal grandmother who is 88 and full of laughter goes in for a surgery today… World keeps on spinning spinning spinning.￼
All the vibes all the vibes #Grateful #Patience￼
Now I need another coffee and to go hang up the umeboshi in the sun. ￼
Roll slow, be gentle, eat healthy, look out for your vulnerable friends and neighbours, minimize TV, start a novel, watch all the foreign films you’ve always meant to, crack open War & Peace like you should’ve years ago / hit me up if you need some podcasts or train videos #hugs
I add: If anyone makes interesting things or needs a bit of encouragement or even maybe advice about their projects, or has just made something they want to share and want someone to click on something and share them along, I got you, Im yer dude #InstantFanClub
My pals from Hootsuite – which obv was a such a big part of my life and something i never go to “say goodbye” to – made the most remarkably kind dispatch.
The intrepid Cameron Uganec nonchalantly dropped a note that he and Ryan Holmes had a wrangled a little something and sent me this link which features the sweetest words a fellow ever deserves to hear from colleagues > friends > family spread around the world.
This is rather personal to say the least and my first instinct is to keep it this way but i also know that many other people will truly be edified by watching/hearing this outpouring of agape. As such, no holding back.
PS I would do that thing where you tag all appropriate people but lots of “cool kids” aren’t hanging out here and this is a bit too sensitive to the schoolyard fo Twitter and def not Snapchattable so just going to send it out as-is, with all the hugs.
I will however include a reply to the participants who extended such a gracious effort to this drifting poet who is no longer drifting, ergo:
I am so wonderfully filled with all the emotions and so incredibly grateful to each of you for your words and vibes. I explained to Ryoko (who loved seeing all of you and was answering back to your charming Japanese) who each of you are, and how we came into each other’s world, and also how i never go to say “goodbye” … i didn’t want to leave, one day my body/life/world changed and was never able to return – this was *so* hard and as i collapsed and drifted for so long. So many times, just when i needed it most, one of you wonderful beings would appear with a helping hand, a kind word, a check in, a rescue I’ve forgotten a lot of things but not those #realtalk.
Now this wonderful video creates something far better than “closure”, rather helps me open this wonderful new reinvention of life. Truly thrilled and so completely surprised to see face after beautiful face (my goodness you are all so fabulously good looking!) – hearing your sincere words is something i will treasure this week and forever. This goes in the vault and in my heart.
Please accept my fondest thanks for letting me part of your lives and i hope to be a worthy friend until we are all olden and grey. Oh also, was so cool to see everyone spread all over the world on various career (is that what you call them?) and adventures. Of course, please make sure i have current postal address so i can send you random cards and treats and make sure i introduce myself to your kiddos (where applicable).
Head melted from an incredible gesture of kindness which completely shocked and surprised me yesterday / don’t mean to be vague, but still searching for the right words and manner to say how truly and undeniably moved I am. #owls#tribute#video
Also, met 藤田良子’s grandmother, uncle, aunt, cousins etc. Who were all so fun and funny and kind / My language skills are improving daily which feels really nice as well.
Plus, accompanied new family as they went to do their civic voting duty at the polling place at the local junior high school where these lovely blossoms brightened the walk.
Oh one more thing, received an extraordinary wedding gift all the way from Scotland / said “book” on the customs declaration but it definitely was not a book. A welcome surprise from a lovely couple who befriended me during a really hard time while I was alone and far far away from anything and anywhere.
Going to Osaka for a couple days to do some paperwork at the Canadian consulate, pick up handcrafted rings, buy a few arts and craft supplies and eat takoyaki… We’re getting close to friends arriving! Still several items on the list but making sure to enjoy the process and keep pacing with in the boundaries for my body.
Finally up worked nerve/courage to watch @unrestfilm – Cried & laughed + noted im not alone. So much familiar: documenting, crashing, trying *everything*, endless Drs, so much confusion/suspicion/loss. 5 years along #cfsme & #fibro. Was invincible dynamite before.
Also, was funny in the movie to see her obsessing about mold and putting up a tent (I did this), making bone broth (which I did obsessively and one of my former charges now has a bone broth company), all the supplements (which I spent so much money on!), and all the “superfood“ smoothies/drinks/concoctions… Oh, and also all the Chinese herbal remedies cooked up in a big pot making the whole house smell crazy weird.