Tag Archives: cfs/me

Healing: Laundry & Unrest

Lots of action and activities and errands last Monday, makes the heart and head happy but the body can’t quite stay/catch up so went into #mecfs “crash mode” on tuesday – though I’ve stumbled through this for so many years now, it never gets easier / such pain and unrest and confusion – kinda like epic jet lag plus hangover plus flu and a kick in the head/gut/kneecap all at the same time #NonScientificAnalysis

Blanket note: Master Artist Bill Reid design / collab with canadian national history museum / wedding gift from pal Kemp Edmonds.

Slowly coming back to life on Wednesday – enough to wash the dishes and fold the laundry. I really enjoy folding laundry except for fitted sheets. I would investigate the proper technique but I really don’t need another obsession 🙂

Noting I am writing this annotation on Canada’s first national Day of truth and reconciliation (on which I made appropriate donations to express my solidarity in a practical manner as well as lighting incense or metaphysical support)

Tomorrow is usual check-in with the neurologist at the city hospital.

Memo: With my weird illness (though hardly *uncommon*) there’s no usual treatment path but the check-ins keeps me in the system as well as acquiring minor medication to help smooth out the edges (ditched all the heavy duty medication some years ago – more pain but more brain).

PS with the onset of “long-haul C 19” illness it’s suddenly given a lot more awareness, research, science towards my nuanced chronic viral infection which presents some of the similar symptoms

Anyhow, just wanted to share the simple pleasure of folded laundry. No big deal, I roll-on, just floating it out there in solidarity with other folks who are primarily homebodies due to physical constraints which can feel a little challenging as people are getting out and about a bit more

Healing Journal: 7 years, so much between

As it goes, a photo from 2013 popped into rotation today: me as usual with beard, specs and art in the background so… I snapped another quick similar pose and noted that despite the hard miles of these last seven years – all the hospitals, all the treatments, all the medication, all the stopping medications, all the loss (name it), so many dear ones passing, at least four concussion level falls & crashes (Vancouver, Adelaide, Pacifica, Chiang Mai), so much being gone gone gone lost (not wanting to be found), finding myself in harms way intentionally and otherwise, some terrible decisions, some great decisions, looking anywhere for home, not wanting to be home, forgetting about home – so many > too many places – and then somehow found – with all of “that”, I don’t look all that worse for wear.

The Buddha is quoted as saying, “to gain anything, first you must lose everything” I did and then found out that Buddha never said that – (dang *experts*). Regardless, some of what I lost, I picked back up, other parts I left behind.

Seven years which felt like 17, and i’m only scratched & dented gently & mostly on the inside. It’s good for poetry if nothing else.

70 more to go. Still. At least.

PS Noting that there was a lot of damage and a lot less smiling in “the between years”. Might share at some point, but just came here to say thanks for all your kind words and support. Almost convinced I’m worth it 🙂