Healing: stumbling (but not defeated) & “rescued” by lunch

Briefly: Messed up date with hospital appointments (every time, like lining up dominos to get all doctors/injections/tests lined up on same day and was supposed to be here last Friday) getting some of the stuff done today but means back here again next Friday. Very discouraged :(

*Not smiling* with my eyes

The hospital staff were super accommodating and got me in for “cocktail injection” and with Chinese Medicine Doctor who reviewed my memo and gave a thorough exam of abdomen, pulses and tongue.

TCM Doctor told me pulses are very weak and shallow, my body is fighting and trying but needs rest + Hot Springs and protein.

of course the hospital has flowers on display

I’ll be back next Friday to finish up the parts of the visit didn’t get done this time including inquiries about options for IVIG & Ozone therapy.

Re-upped my TCM medicines and a weeks worth of “allopathic” meds in lieu of infectious disease Doctor who i’ll see next Friday.

Notes: those of “us in this chronic/complex situation” know that it’s not just as easy as going to the hospital – a hospital visit is really a 3 day endeavor of preparation, doing and recovering (besides choosing an outfit appropriate for easy injections)

this shoefie doesn’t feature the best socks but was already sporting striped shirt along with the glenplaid trousers – however, the combination with the painted hospital stripes on the floor make it particularly awesome I think

Then: Dropped off prescriptions at pharmacy and now at favourite kissaten for lunch.

(If pharma can prepare meds in time, great if not, they sent by courier. Such service!)

The Kissaten “Liberal” has a couple of my mini postbox artwork cards on display and just gave me a cute business card size calendar with a cat on the other side.

Thank goodness my incredible wife (rocking a Canadian tuxedo no less) was with me today to help stick handle the admin kerfuffle.

I’m completely defeated, depleted, discouraged, constantly running on fumes and ganbaru power.

However, a lovely lunch with very gracious kissaten master. He is 3rd generation hospitality-ist / grandmother ran a Yakiniku place, father this place before him.

He told us where all the various ingredients came from including brand new batch of rice delivered by the farmer from Hiroshima Prefecture.

I’ve avoided rice/potatoes/pasta/bread etc. of late but couldn’t help but to enjoy due to his excitement in sharing.

Showed metal coffee grinder, made in Germany, his grandfather used.

Set lunch ¥750 + royal milk tea ¥400 <3

And finally, I saw this super cute bike outside the pharmacy where all the traditional Chinese medicine sachet and other various medication’s were prepared, reviewed and handed it off in the same amount of time it took us to enjoy lunch.

Thanks for support friends / (another) topsy-turvy day however: I’m very deliberately re-attenuating my energy magnets to attract new & more goodness and answers. I’ve asked a lot of questions this last cough while and very open to new answers.

The leaf was just hanging there suspended by a thread of a spiderweb. Suspended animation, decaying slowly, delayed from hitting the ground, twisting in the wind. So much poetry in that sensation and situation.

Next Day:

Had a cry, a bath, lousy sleep / good nutrition but but still I wish an entire platter of chocolate chip cookies with suddenly appear in my bedroom.

Wife’s wonderful friend is visiting from Shodoshima (one of the many islands in the nearby Seto nai kai / inland sea) Ichiro absolutely adores her – pot of oden bubbling on woodstove, they will make wreaths in carport/workshop lounge.

I helped tidy up kitchen, served tea & dried persimmons & now hiding in bedroom sort-ganizing TCM meds & taking oxygen into brain.

The “post exertional malaise” coupled with the feeling of “I messed up which means I’m back there next Friday” has really left me depleted but I’m trying to keep from spiraling down words with the blues by saying these things out loud.

Also: Thursday is a special event at the kid’s school in Kurashiki which is about an hour away.

To conserve energy, we will go night before and stay over in a sort of dorm-type place but must remember this to conserve energy for Friday.

There’s a cost for each energy pellet used.

When you are heading to hospital (anxious with anxiety for almost no reason) but sort of look like you’re heading to try out for a Ska band… and stop at a new bakery on the way to bring a gift of a bottle of wine and a custom postcard and it’s the cutest thing outside of France.

Always more to say… would you like to see the wreaths the trio made?