Diary: May 5月, Beguiled (& rather) Bewildered

Oh bye May

Spinning past another month, we’re at the 31st and I’m waiting to try out a new Ayurveda clinic here in dear Okayama. So a few annotations:

Guess it ain’t no secret that I’ve had a hard time bouncing up this month/year, however in the midst of it all I’m out of bed *almost* every day and doing a few things around the house even if it’s just dishes, laundry, compost, making tea and rice. Some days I do a few more things, for example:

This month we had a surprise overseas visitor and we went together to one of the inland sea islands as well as enjoying food & items together – and it was a joy to share my “new life” with a friend from my before times.

I’ve done a few sessions of sorting around in the kura barn and, going through bins of artifacts and taking from “stuff in a bin” to curated collections in binders with labels and themes. It’s a task requiring equal parts organizational theory, temporary nostalgia, celebrating past and imagining futures, specifically “what can I make with all these things to amplify what it means?” None of the items are by themselves significant for the collection of them all creates a tapestry of life. That sounds rather “grand” but in my mind, it’s the usual days in regular life that make life remarkable.

Coming on Two & looking like a young man already

Wonderful child Ichiro has battled through a couple of snotty noses, colds and fevers which sometimes pull him out of school due to “protocols“ but my goodness, the words are tumbling out of his mouth now, the balance is increasing, his awareness of where things go and how to do things is increasing on the regular and I am absolutely proud. I am trying to add to my skill set of how to “tug the reins“ a little bit without being a grumpy Papa and not buying into the fallacy of punishment, which perpetuates and hides problems and always requires escalation and this is proven – throughout forever – to be generally ineffective & mostly unwise.

My treasures and the penguins on a recent trip to Antarctica via Shimane

Darling wife Ryoko is studying for her “tree doctor” level up exam coming up later this year and has also continued work on her charcoal kilns and tidying up her tool shed a little bit for maximum organization efficiency. She’s also been doing some secret live streams while kiddo and I are in the bath and usually get sa couple piano songs out before Ichiro yelled out “bing bong Mama!” and we do our “Captain Ichiro, are you ready?” countdown to exit bath, dry up, lotion and pajamas, stories, cuddles and sleep.

For me, sleep is a struggle – i sleep long but shallow & unrefeshing/replenishing plus make up in fits and starts + dealing with a lot of neurological pain still along with the brain fog, confusion and general crippling fatigue. So, new plan is to change my periodic check ins/administrative visits from the “big city general” hospital to the University Hospital where they have specific departments investigating long-term chronic post-viral inflammation/immune system diseases relating to the current cee-one-nine virus which kinda dovetails into my situation with #MECFS. There is also a traditional Chinese medicine clinic on site i’ll endeavour to try in my quest for new approached for increasing my baseline.

Always have at least a dozen sleeping masks on hand… i mean on face

As I mentioned in a video (I should know that I’ve done a couple more dispatches in my “healing ramble” series if curious) this month was the awareness campaign month for my illness, as well as awareness month for mental health, Asia Pacific islanders, IBS/Crohn’s and other things (Cascadia Day!) which have impacted my life. These notable days – coupled with a few significant anniversaries: me becoming ill and memorial service / for my Mom & Creepers & Chums party; I guess added onto the emotional exhaustion of just being constantly zonked.

Celebrating Cascadia several years back and Evelyn Street, Lynn Valley, North Vancouver, unceded Cascadia bioregion

But hey, here I am talking about it!The important thing is, I have a wonderful family here and great friends around the world, food is delivered weekly, we plant seeds in the garden, postcards and packages come from time to time, I have enough books and records to keep me constantly amused and I’ve even done a bit of scrapbooking about our trip a couple months ago to Shimane.

Tip: send postcards to yourself

Yes, mentally I always feel like “I should be doing more” and I guess felt since was a little kid reading Tintin books that I was meant to be “out there in the world sparking revolutions” – so I remember to pause and think of all the things “accomplished” in the last three years since I came to Japan and all the things in my almost 52 years… So many countries, conversations, projects and so much more to come.

Adventures ahead, adventures behind, same same different different

I also continue to fiddle away at this “creative life archive” / when I run down and stuck in bed, I listen to audiobooks and longform podcast and sometimes tappity tappity on the pocket robot to assemble posts with pictures, musings, memories and what not. I love the feeling of hitting publish and thinking that someone might find a bit of inspiration or amusement.

Getting hot and humid so hoping in June we might have some beach days and also set up the yard for more playtime right here. Ichiro hits two on the 23rd so have an eye on a balance bike and maybe a visit to a zoo.

Always more, we’ve got all the time in the world.

A wonderful painting I came across: Martina Heiduczek
“Coffee and Friendship” / two of my favorite things :)

Whatcha think?